My mother was culling through past travel photos, about 900 or so and I noticed that the collection was, reasonably, mostly of where we traveled, but not so common, there were few photos of the family, the participants in the travel. I know I should be grateful because as I veiwed the photos my parents did take of the family, there was not a single flattering photo of me. There are photos of me asleep with my mouth hanging open, eating or squinting against direct sunlight, I look fat in every one. Maybe I was fat, I don’t trust the photos to give me a reality check.
When my father passed away, my mother picked up his torch and his camera. If there is an unflattering angle, if I’m looking particularly awful, there she is shooting with alacrity; Oh you just woke up, let’s take a picture! Oh look you’re slouching in front of a computer, let’s take a profile shot.
I am still puzzling over my parents propensity towards unflattering angles, capturing me in the worst light, the worst pose possible. This preference for the ugly makes makes me long for the very old fashion days when a camera was the exception, film was expensive and developing was prohibitive. This whole closed eco-system kept producing photos to the bare minimum. The first communion, the wedding, two new grandchild photographs. Because committing such events to film was a big deal, the subject had a chance to prepare: time to make sure the hair is right, the dress is straighten, and a to strike a flattering pose that the latest magazine promised would make you look five pounds thinner. This restraint suits me far better than the collection of spontaneous photographs of: me sleeping on the train, me sleeping in a bean bag chair flush with a fever of 103, me eating a hard stale sandwich in Hyde Park, me scarfing cold cereal in a Motel Six. Me waiting in line for the restroom.
I know I should be grateful that my father never had the opportunity to create the web site, badphotosof Catharine.com. I’m sure he would have loved sharing all those awkward moments with the world, including my potential clients and employers.
So for that, I am very grateful.
